| 1 | Button and the Moustache | 67 |
| 2 | Mark Webber | 66 |
| 3 | Fernando Alonso | 61 |
| 4 | One-stop Perez | 58 |
| 5 | Kamui Kobayashi | 57 |
| 6 | Adrian Sutil | 49 |
| 7 | Jaime El Incognito | 43 |
| 8 | Michael Schumacher | 41 |
| 9 | Lewis Hamilton | 39 |
| 10 | Nico Rosberg | 32 |
| 11 | Sebastien Vettel | 30 |
| 12 | Heikki Kovalainen | 24 |
| = | Squadron Leader Heidfeld | 24 |
| = | Wing Commander Petrov | 24 |
| 15 | Paul Di Resta | 18 |
| 16 | Mclaren | 16 |
| = | Red Bull Racing | 16 |
| 18 | Felipe Massa | 15 |
| 19 | Sebastien Buemi | 15 |
| 20 | Rain | 13 |
| = | Pastor Maldonado | 13 |
| = | Hispania Racing Team | 13 |
| 23 | Shoestring Theatre Company | 10 |
| 24 | Rubens Barrichello | 9 |
| 25 | Mary | 7 |
| = | Renault Squadron | 7 |
| 27 | Canada | 6 |
| 28 | Le Mans 24hrs | 5 |
| = | The Official Blog Fish | 5 |
| = | Audi Racing Team | 5 |
| = | Jarno Trulli | 5 |
| = | Mercedes | 5 |
| = | Helen & Paul | 5 |
| 34 | Hungary | 4 |
| = | Holly | 4 |
| = | Vitantonio Liuzzi | 4 |
| = | Force India | 4 |
| = | John | 4 |
| 39 | Daniel Ricciardo | 3 |
| 40 | Pirelli | 2 |
| = | One-Stop Perez 2.0 | 2 |
| = | Hungarian Marshalls | 2 |
| = | The grid as a whole | 2 |
| = | Yas Marina | 2 |
| = | Torro Rosso | 2 |
| = | Bruno Senna | 2 |
| 47 | Bob the cat | 1 |
| = | Ron Dennis | 1 |
| = | The British GP | 1 |
| = | The Principality of Monaco | 1 |
| = | Spa Francorchamps | 1 |
| = | India | 1 |
| = | Barriers at Nouvelle Chicane | 1 |
| = | The Magic Paddle | 1 |
| = | Jerome D'Ambrosio | 1 |
| = | Lotus Racing | 1 |
| = | All you can eat buffets | 1 |
| = | The Bun Shop | 1 |
| = | Williams Racing | 1 |
| = | Mandy's perspective stairs | 1 |
| = | Ted Kravitz on helium | 1 |
The also official Calum D.C. penalties championship
Key DT = Drive-though penalty
S&G = Stop and Go penalty
5P = Five place grid drop
10P = Ten place grid drop
PrTP = Post-race Time Penalty
excl(D) = exclusion for violation of driving standards
excl(T) = exclusion for violation of technical regulations
* = penalty/exclusion under appeal
| Postion | Guilty Party | DT | S&G | 3P | 5P | 10P | PrTP | excl(D) | excl(T) | Fines | Total |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Lewis Hamilton | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | €0 | 6 |
| 2 | Pastor Maldonado | 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | €0 | 5 |
| 3 | One-Stop Perez | 3 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | €0 | 4 |
| 4 | Bruno Senna | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | €0 | 3 |
| 5 | Sebastien Buemi | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | €0 | 3 |
| 6 | Vitantonio Liuzzi | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | €0 | 3 |
| 7 | Two-Cakes-Up Button | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | €0 | 2 |
| = | Paul Di Resta | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | €0 | 2 |
| = | Kamui Kobayashi | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | €0 | 2 |
| 10 | Sauber | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | €0 | 2 |
| 11 | Narain Karthikeyan | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | €2800 | 2 |
| 12 | Jerome D'Ambrosio | 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | €0 | 2 |
| = | Wing Commander Petrov | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | €0 | 1 |
| 14 | Rubens Barrichello | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | €0 | 1 |
| = | Squadron Leader Heidfeld | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | €0 | 1 |
| = | Jaime El Incognito | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | €0 | 1 |
| = | Michael Schumacher | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | €0 | 1 |
| = | Adrian Sutil | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | €0 | 1 |
| = | Felipe Massa | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | €0 | 1 |
| = | Heikki Kovalainen | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | €0 | 1 |
| = | Timo Glock | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | €0 | 1 |
| 22 | Daniel Ricciardo | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | €0 | 1 |
| 23 | Fernando Alonso | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | €0 | 1 |
The still official Calum D.C. dubious dealings championship
The arbitrary table for those making suspicious calls - mainly dealing with team orders and those people that may be up to them or other odd acts of a dubious nature.
| Offender | Penalty Points |
|---|---|
| Lewis Hamilton | 4 |
| Michael Schumacher | 4 |
| The Stewards | 3 |
| Eurosport | 3 |
| Adrian Sutil | 3 |
| DRS | 2 |
| Paul Di Resta | 2 |
| Health and Safety | 2 |
| Sky television | 2 |
| Bruno Senna | 2 |
| Monsoon Rains | 1 |
| The tumbling marshal | 1 |
| Ferrari | 1 |
| Force India | 1 |
| Dual DRS implementation | 1 |
| Wing Commander Petrov | 1 |
| Jaime El Incognito | 1 |
| Valencia 'street' track | 1 |
| Sebastien Buemi | 1 |
| Kamui Kobayashi | 1 |
| Squadron Leader Heidfeld | 1 |
| Qualifying Strategy | 1 |
| Renault Squadron | 1 |
| Martin Whitmarsh | 1 |
| Turn 10 at Singapore | 1 |
| Pastor Maldonado | 1 |
| South Korean Pit Exit | 1 |
| BBC iPlayer | 1 |
| One-Stop Perez | 1 |
| Sauber | 1 |
| Empire Cinemas | 1 |
| Rain | 1 |
| Original Fish | 1 |
| My Vocal System | 1 |
| Columbo | 1 |
| The Regulations | 1 |
| Circuit de Catalunya | 1 |
| Prime Tyre Compound | 1 |
| Deceptive Weather Radars | 1 |
